Preparing an older sibling for a new baby – How we are preparing Oliver to become a new big brother

Mummy, Daddy and Oliver.
Mummy, Daddy and Oliver.

 
 

As our due date is getting ever closer, we have really started to focus on preparing Oliver to be a big brother.

 
 

We fell pregnant with our little peanut when Oliver was just nine months old and so even though we have been talking to him about the pregnancy and the baby from the start, it is only recently that Oliver has started to become more aware that Mummy and Daddy are having another baby.

 
 

From the start we included Oliver in the pregnancy and we took him to the scans and midwife appointments with us as much as possible. At our 20 week scan, the sonographer was absolutely brilliant and described what was going on during the scan so that Oliver was involved.

 
 

At around 26 weeks, we found a fabulous book called ‘ I’m a new big brother’ which is part of the Pirate Pete series. We started reading it to Oliver straight away as it covers the whole process of becoming a big brother and highlights how important the job of being a big brother is. I leave this book out every day so that Oliver can choose to either flick through himself and look at the pictures, or bring it to me for me to read to him.

 
 

Pirate Pete - I'm a New Big Brother
Pirate Pete – I’m a New Big Brother

 
 

The book explains how Pirate Pete’s Mummy is growing a baby in her tummy and how when she goes to hospital with Pirate Pete’s Daddy, Pirate Pete stays with his Grandad for a little while. When Pirate Pete’s Mummy and Daddy come home from the hospital they have a new baby and the book then goes on to show all of the things Pirate Pete can help with and all of the things he can show the new baby. It also covers how even though there is a new baby, Pirate Pete still has special time with his Mummy and Daddy. There is even a sound button that plays a baby giggling, which Oliver loves pushing.

 
 

We have also included Oliver where possible in the construction of the nursery and he even helped build the cot up in Peanut’s bedroom. With all of the decorating going on in Peanut’s room, we decided to give Oliver’s room a bit of a makeover too. (You can read about that in the blog post about Oliver moving to his toddler bed here.)

 
 

Daddy and Oliver building the new pram.
Daddy and Oliver building the new pram.

 
 

As we will have two children under two, we have purchased a new pram. We opted for the icandy Peach Blossom, which I will be posting about when Peanut arrives and we can actually take it out for a spin. To make sure Oliver knows that he is as much a part of this new adventure as myself and Mr. C, we got Oliver to help us construct the pram. He was a fabulous little helper and it made the whole ‘pram building process’ much less of a chore and more of a fun family activity.

 
 

As well as all of these things, we have decided to create ‘gift bags’ as part of the introduction when Peanut arrives. A lot of people advised getting a gift from the baby to Oliver, but I didn’t want to start the journey into parenting two children by each of them getting a present when something happens, such as birthdays, Christenings etc. So we decided that both of them will get a gift bag from the other and that way they start off on level ground and both still get spoilt.

 
 

Oliver's 'I'm a new big brother' gift bag.
Oliver’s ‘I’m a new big brother’ gift bag.

 
 

We’ve tried to make the bags as similar as possible, while still being personalised. We felt that they should both have one big gift each, which was something nice just for them and then smaller gifts that focused on being siblings.

 
 

In Oliver’s bag we have included:

 
 

In Peanut’s bag we have included:

  • Ewan the dream sheep
  • A personalised siblings photo frame
  • A siblings babygrow
  • A letter from Oliver
  • A letter from Mummy and Daddy

 
 

We will be putting Oliver and Peanut’s first photo together in the photo frame and placing the letters in the back of it after they have been read, so that they can be kept forever.

 
 

Making sure we prepare Oliver as best we can to be a big brother is so important to us. He has always had all of our attention and with limited support around us, he has rarely been away from either myself or Mr. C and so we wanted to make sure he knows that even though we are having another baby, we will always love him just as much and that by having another baby, we are giving him a best friend, a partner in crime and overall someone else that will love him just as much as we do.

 
 
 

How did you prepare your first child to become an elder sibling? I would love to know if there is anymore we can do. Let me know in the comments, on Twitter, Instagram and on Facebook.

6 thoughts

  1. Ah this is lovely. ..I’ve just started thinking about how I’m going to prepare my little boy, he will be 21 months when the baby arrives (in 8 weeks ish!) so we are in a very similar situation to you and have done a few similar things. I’ve just ordered the book you recommend, we’ve been sharing There’s a house inside my Mummy so far and think this will be a nice addition now he’s a little bit bigger. Good luck with everything and I look forward to following your journey x

    1. That is a nice age gap 😊.

      I hope it all goes well for you, it’s difficult trying to prepare them for such a big change when they don’t fully understand what is going properly.

      Keep me posted with how it all goes and thank you for reading 💕 x

  2. Sounds like you’ve done loads to get him involved, we did the same(our gap is 20 months). We have the books ‘there’s a house in mummy’s tummy’ which is brilliant, and let Indiana listen to Her brothers heartbeat on the Doppler too. She had a baby doll which she looked after too which really helps them understand. You’ll love the pram, it’s beautiful and so easy to push! Xx

    1. I read your post about preparing Indiana, it was absolutely fabulous. I know a few people who have bought their children dolls to ‘practice’ on, but I thought Oliver was slightly too young to understand fully. Fabulous news about the pram, my last one had a mind of it’s own, which always made for eventful trips to shops with breakables. Thank you for reading my post and taking the time to comment. Good luck with your new arrival, I look forward to reading all about your adventures on your blog x

  3. This is lovely. Our son will be 2 and a half when our daughter is born in January. We’ve told him theres a baby in mummies tummy. I would’ve loved to have taken him to the scan but our hops said no children on the letter we had. I have another scan at 32 weeks so I might just take him anyway and tough! I’d love him to see it with us. Dexter loves helping me with baby things and he even rubs coconut oil on my belly and kisses it. I love there idea of the letters to each other, thats beautiful, along with the photos. I may have to ‘borrow’ that idea. Such a lovely post, I’m sure he is going to love being a big brother x http://messystainsandgrowingpains.co.uk/

    1. Thank you for reading and commenting. Congratulations, how exciting! What a fabulous way to start the year. That will be such a lovely age gap and they will grow up being the best of friends. It seems like your eldest is very excited to be a big brother. Wishing you all the best for the rest of your pregnancy and good luck with the new arrival x

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